One of the most frustrating things for those new to online dating is when they reach the realization that even though the dating service is full of singles, getting a conversation started can still be very difficult. I’d like to discus one method that improved my success the most and then and some benefits of this approach.
Improving Your Success Rate
In my experience and from discussing online dating with others, the single thing that helps improve response rates the most is simply keeping your first contact short. This may sound like a strange rule so let me explain why this works.
1. Long Emails May Just Waste Your Time
Many profiles you see are not active or those active may not be paying members of the dating service. If you take a half hour to write the perfect email and they have no way to respond you’ve wasted your time. Better to send many short emails than a few long ones. This fact is also important to keep in mind when you are receiving few responses in general: there are many reasons people do not respond and often it is simply because they can’t! One mistake many singles make when dating online is to assume that every missing response is rejection.
2. Short Emails Help You Avoid Triggering Red Flags
As you date online, you will discover that while most singles are quite normal, there are also some very strange people out there. Just as you will begin to watch for “red flags”, so will the people you are contacting and long emails happen to be a big red flag for many of us. This is because these long emails frequently share or request far too much in what is really the first contact moments.
3. Let Your Dating Profile Do Its Job
Your profile is the place to describe yourself in detail, not your first email. If you feel like you need to provide additional details in your first emails that is probably a sign that you need to update your profile to include that information. Remember, that first email really serves to get your profile viewed and hopefully move things forward from there.
When I switched to using shorter emails I saw my success improve noticeably. I also started contacting more people: if many people I contact are unable to respond to me than it is better to contact additional singles to help mitigate that issue.
Brad Miller runs the a blog dedicated to providing online dating advice and tips at littleredrails.com. He dated online extremely aggressively for a year, doing very poorly at first but, through some hard learning, found great success eventually leading him to meeting his wife.
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I’ve studied online dating like a mad scientist and created a simple two-step system you can follow to effortless online dating success. I’m not one of those dating ‘Gurus’ I’m a normal guy who painstakingly dissected online dating and is publishing his findings for your benefit. Why? Because I’ve been where you are. I know how much it can suck to send 30 emails and get ZERO responses. It sucks. I want to help you get where I am. I have an inbox FILLED with women who will drop everything to go out with me. Test my system, it works. L8